stretching my brain feels refreshing.

check out these neat blocks.
ive seen more of those places than not.
YESSSS.

also?
hotel life in phoenix is tripping me out a little.
i hate this particular town but i love being out and the adventure of .. not.. having.. my house...

i've decided to try out the practice of spending days in silence. i've said this before but i have scheduled days in the coming weeks and i'm going to commit myself to this. the way i've been trying to commit myself to being out in the sun, hikking and otherwise communing with the earth.

theron and i had an intense talk about rising above and this goes nicely with my mantra of the moment:
work hard and be nice to people

there were cupcakes at work today. nice.
its nice to feel nice. about work. in a way i'm relieved to have been asked to come to phoenix for the turnaround, in a way it feels like they want to make an honet woman outta me, if you will, like, i'm good enough to be part of the clique. which when i say it out like that sound lame and needy of me.
so nevermind


so about how i said i was excited to be in ahotel room with tv?
i think i hate tv.
i watched about 30 minutes last night and turned it off.
and this morning i patched the music from my computer into the tv and i can listen to music instead. and thats all i want. i don't even feel inclined to zone out to the tube. i guess i've learned something.

to sum up:
travel makes me happy, even small amounts.
quiet and nature are good.
work is good if you let it
and if it lets you, it helps.
music is better than tv
i like rice cakes.
go.

ps brush your teeth with your non dominant hand. does it feel weird?
i'ma keep doing that till its not weird anymore. then i will switch back.

good news

well bad news first: my neck-shoulder is causing me alarming pain. i can feel it in my ear and all the way down my arm to my hand. sleeping is painful. looking around is painful. working tomorrow is probably going to be painful, barring a miracle healing in my sleep. blast you, recurring injury! blast you spot arm! whatever. i can deal.
also my allergies are making like extra sniffly.

ok! good news:
i got paid. whatever, you say, that isn't news. but its the difference between not being able to buy groceries, and being able to buy groceries. and i did. buy them today and it's nice to have fresh food in the house. stuff that makes me feel normal, like eggs and carrots and orange juice. ah.

also in the financial sector, my horrific poverty is coming to an end. i got a verbal commitment from my awesome friend jmusarra who wants to be my roommate, in this house. i know i wanted to leave this place and move into somewhere nice alone, but frankly this is easier (i dont have to .. ya know, pack. and find another house!) and cheaper, as we can share expenses and i would be hard pressed to find somewhere to live alone for $375. and he's a do-it-yerself-er like me and is interested in backyard horticulture. so now that i spent a year avoiding making costly improvements to the property because i didnt believe i'd be here long enough to reap the benefits, i'm kicking myself for not planting the grapevines when we got here.

There will be grapevines and new chickens forthwith.
we are also going to grow corn. i'm going to try out potatoes also, and other things. but first and foremost grape vines! because that back fence is ugly and could be so easily improved by a few relatively cheap lil guys. i guess it takes 5 years for a grapevine to produce.. depending on how old they are when i buy them, i may even see fruits while i live here! oh rapture! maybe a fig tree!

other good news: i got new brakes for my bike. and bar tape. i'm going to work up the give-a-crap to transfer my nice seat from Babe who i do not ride, onto dark lord. then he will be .. well i should not say complete.. but better!

what else.
i applied for a job (shhh.) and got an email saying to expect a phone call to schedule an interview perhaps. i'm feeling optimistic. it wouldnt change my situation with all the theatre gigs i have, but add to them another one, with a nice rate. and it might be a little less back breaking.

going to phoenix over the weekend/ into next week for some work. thats why the grocery bill was so high: need to bring things that require little prep, as hotel doesnt offer more than hot water really. they are paing me a per diem but i'd like to pocket that, or not use it all up in crummy resteraunts, anyway.

*counting on fingers*
roommate,
garden,
bike repair,
possible new job,

ok and yoga!
yoga in the park was amazing and awesome and really showed me where ive been neglecting my body the last couple years. it was followed by a delightful good salad lunch at the rincon market and this is a pattern i hope to continue. i need to do more than once a week, but until my finances even out, i will have to settle for home practice.

and hiking has been mighty fulfilling too.

i have awesome friends.
i'm a happy girl.
the end.

doop de doo

ok so i made banana bread.
and its awesome.
and i made more "white bread"
and its better than the first try.

and i saw this on
this guy's blog and it rocked me so hard.



kalyn gets in tonight. i'm stoked.
in other news?
the house is mostly clean.
i'm getting tan.
ummmm
my mom got me a book in utah:
MORMON COOKING
(Authentic Recipes)

oh. casseroles and pies.
mmmmm
i'm only a little ashamed to admit that i will be trying them out.

hallelujah

When you were young
You were the king of carrot flowers
And how you built a tower tumbling through the trees
In holy rattlesnakes that fell all around your feet

And your mom would stick a fork right into daddy's shoulder
And dad would throw the garbage all across the floor
As we would lay and learn what each other's bodies were for

And this is the room
One afternoon I knew I could love you
And from above you how I sank into your soul
Into that secret place where no one dares to go

And your mom would drink until she was no longer speaking
And dad would dream of all the different ways to die
Each one a little more than he could dare to try

i wish i was gifted enough to have written that but i didn't.
anyhow. it really does the trick, that song, describing ... something vague..


i took my bike out and rode around to a bunch of flowering trees and other delicious smelling plants.
and it was nice and more than made up for what attending traffic skool today sucked out of my will to live.
<3
ah.

solace

i am at the cafe and chose to sit in the smoking room because the airflow is nice and i like that it tends to be less crowded than the main room, and blah blah and it Is nice in here and we were all peacefully doing our thing: homework and i registered for my driving skool and we are having our coffee and some of us are having cigarettes and then Crowd Of Obnoxious people came in and sit down around the table in the middle, and all three light up when only one person has purchased a bottle of water. and i want to HIT THEM. and they are headed up by a girl with an obnoxious high pitched voice that can neither talk below a 200Db level or ... fewer than 95 wpm. really. tempted to hit her. the girl is the girl who wears makeup and big dangly earrings to yoga class.

i am extra pleased when they all get up and leave. HOORAY.

anyways i was going to write about how i love tucson and i love that i see people i know every time i go out of my house. its nice, seeing bilal every day. today he was pedaling furiously towards his home and his black vest over white tee shirt was flapping in the breeze. and he shouted hello as we passed each other.
nice.
i can has a sense of community?
plz?
that is all.
i went on the bike ride last night and it wasnt horrible but it was not up to its usual awesomeness. i think if everyone who is turned off by the way it has devolved started going again? it would be ok. this is my hope.

in other news?
......
yay spring! orange trees are blooming deliciously and the whatever those are that make the little orange puff balls are also blooming odiferously and its nice. being alive is pleasant. do we all agree?